20 mile water carry and Cabazon
Day 15, meets me with solid vibes. Making my way to the water source spigot off Fuller Ridge, met my fellow hiker family and took an Uber to Cabazon for some Taco Bell. Being able to recharge all of my batteries and eat over 2,000 calories was the key! This awfully nice couple were generous enough to buy me 4 tacos on top of what I payed for, so I have dinner for tonight! I’m so grateful for the people being so generous. Maybe they thought I was homeless, or they knew I was hiking, I’m just thankful for their kindness. Now headed towards Mesa Wind Farm, ITS WINDY! Hoping to get to White Water Preserve for some swimming and camp. It’s so incredibly hot at almost 100 degrees today. Wishing I was back on San Jacinto where it’s a lot cooler.
I have to make it to Big Bear by midday Friday before the post office closes. I might send it tonight and push on for another 10 miles. Although, I’d be doing most of Mission Creek, alone, and at night. I’m not entirely sure if it’s a positive idea, however I don’t really have a choice. I’m 50 miles from Whitewater Preserves to Big Bear City. I haven’t been able to push 25 miles a day yet, so I feel the need to keep going. Unsure what to do. Decided to go out, I left about 8:30. Currently I feel okay and chill, but the night is still young. I have about 9 miles to do to get to where I want to. I might stop if I feel unsafe or too stressed. I do feel comfortable and ready to do this on my own. That’s why I’m out here right? To experience the PCT on my own and figure this whole thing out by myself. Discover the things I’m capable of. Yeah, it might be a bit dangerous, but that’s what this whole adventure is about. Putting yourself through situations you wouldn’t in your daily life. It’s a warm night, the stars are out and they are incredible. The crickets and frogs are going. I’ve even seen a few mice, first time I have this whole trip. I miss my friends, but I will see them again. No service, no problem. Just me, my podcasts, and the footpath ahead.
Mission Creek Sucks
Day 16, means I’m following mission creek for what seems like forever. A washed out trail for miles that’s just a dried up river bed. It’s a nice pace to have water at all times, so little water carry. With the change in water weight, comes incredibly slow and hot slog of a day. I’ve been hiking since 7:30am and it’s now 1pm and I’ve gone approximately 7.2 miles. Almost done with this section I believe, but it does seem like it’ll be another hour or so before I make it to mile 233 where the comments say this section relatively ends. It’s honestly crazy they let you be out here. It’s incredibly exposed and I imagine, if you weren’t prepared and secure in your skills, you’d be needing help ASAP. I’m not one to skip sections, but if this wasn’t a part of the PCT, I wouldn’t be complaining. Hard day today. My least favorite section so far. Glad it’s mostly over with. Now have to crush another 10 or so miles to get closer to Big Bear that way tomorrow is an exceptionally easier day.
Realizing, when looking at my map, that Van Dusen road, leading hikers into Big Bear, is way farther than I initially anticipated. From where I stand, it’s 38.5 miles away. Which means I have to, have to, push miles tonight. Once I get over this hump of a 2,000 ft climb, it’s relatively doable as it’s down hill. However, I really need to get into Big Bear Post Office before they close at 4pm tomorrow and closed for the weekends. I feel slightly stressed and am feeling a bit defeated. The only thing keeping me going is the fact that after all of that, I’ll be able to eat my Dominos! I’ve been craving it since Julien. Averaging 16.5 miles a day, I have to make at least 25-30 miles tonight in order to pull into Big Bear at a decent time tomorrow (I want to hike less tomorrow). Wish me luck as I push my body to the most extreme I ever have and to see if I actually come out of it, ALIVE.
I’m really disappointed today. Mission Creek was not a very pleasant section. On top of that, the several miles to Mission Camp, was also not ideal. I’m not sure what the deal is with California, but section C is my least favorite section so far. I struggled today. I didn’t make it to the campsite I wanted/needed to. It got way too cold way too fast and I had to set up camp. I’m unsure of the next several miles and I didn’t want to risk it in the dark. I have to wake up super early tomorrow and make at least 27 miles in order to get to Highway 18 and hitch into Big Bear. Might just have to bounce my package forward and resupply for a couple of days. Best believe I am getting Dominos as a reward for getting through this awful section.
Marathon or nah
Day 17, brought my first marathon. Crushing miles isn’t something that makes the PCT the PCT. It’s the people. However, my goal is to get to Canada, fast. I want to work up to doing solid miles everyday. It’s a process and everyday cannot be replicated with the variables that come with Nature. When I was training for the PCT, my first thought was “control the controllable’s”. Meaning, my pack, my food interests/consumption, my layering, etc. We can’t control water out here. We’re 266 miles in, 10% of the PCT, and we’re already seeing 20 mile carries. I’m also carrying my bear canister early, I started with it. I trained with it. I’m now also packing full 100-120 mile food carries. Thanks Mom and Dad for helping me out with my packages! Although it may seem unnecessary, I’m trying to push myself. Break my body down and create a new, more capable person. Shoot, Day 1 I started with 42 lbs. In the 70’s they were crushing 70 lbs packs. I find use for 90% of my gear. That 10% I’m worried if I send it, I’ll need it. It’s ounces anyway. My base weight is 15ish lbs. I want long, hard, exhausting days in Nature. That’s why I came out here, for perspective. Find good, even when things are bad.
Friends make things better
Day 18, gave me the coolest night with my trail family yet. The best campsite we’ve had, with a great view of the Mojave, and so many stories. Having to run to the other end of Big Bear, because I went to the wrong Post Office. To having some of the best meals I’ve had in town yet. Shout out Ben and Jerry’s for hooking us hiker trash a sick discount for a ton of Ice Cream. Packing my food in the middle of a parking lot as people pass by. To getting my coolest hitches yet. We’re really becoming what we came out here for. I wanted to be with the dirt. As a youth, that had a different meaning. Getting my hands dirty and still eating food with my hands. My appetite is changing. I’m trying more things, finding new things I like to eat. Eating has always been a challenge for me, malnourishment was/is a heavy possibility for me here. I’m actually eating out here. All of my food is gone before I go into town. I’m hydrated more than I ever have been before. The things I’m doing with myself are impacting me in way that, only those who seek true self enlightenment one can attain. Deep down I want to learn and know myself. Understand my core structure. True likes and dislikes. Find myself at peace. The goal is to learn myself in and out, that’s what I’m here for.
NO BIKES ON TRAIL!!
Day 19, brought me the most frustrated I’ve ever been on trail. This whole trail we’ve seen nothing but “no bicycles/motor vehicles” signs, as we’ve walked along. Today, especially, I saw at least a dozen or so. I’m eating lunch in a grove, and 4 mountain bikers come ripping down the hill! Just after I passed a “no bikes” sign. After eating, I continued my walk where I saw them again 30 minutes after the initial encounter. They stopped, and I told them “it literally says no bikes on the trail”. They hit me with the excuse that they’re looking for a “downed hiker”. Which, I’ve seen all the people on trail today and know no one of the name they gave. They did not have any signs of being SAR, nor did they have anything else with them other than camel backs for their own water consumption, and they were wearing biking gear that made it look like they were getting ready to do the Tour De France. In no way did I believe anything they said. They knew they shouldn’t have been on this trail, and they decided to come up with a horrendous excuse as to why they were there. Just a PSA, if someone is looking for a “downed hiker”, they’re gonna look for them for more than 30 minutes instead of just saying “oh well, we can’t find them, let’s go back”. I called them out on their recklessness and they did not appreciate that and tried to make it seem like I was being ungrateful of their presence. As hikers, we’re not prepared to look around for mountain bikers bombing it down a hill, they could have caused an injury if someone wasn’t paying attention! The entitlement from these bikers is exactly why I began the PCT. To get away from those who don’t want to follow the rules and ruin it for everyone else. People in my daily life feel the need to do whatever they want to with little regard for those around them, then try to make me look bad for “doing the right thing”. This is why I don’t like people very much and decide to stick to my own. I don’t trust people’s intentions and have become very cynical over the years. I just wish people had respect for those around them, instead of just thinking the whole world revolves around them.
Halfway to Tehachapi and lonely
Day 20, has me sad and missing home a ton. Although at home I feel even more isolated and lonely, I can’t help but feel intentionally left out. True, you can’t vibe with everyone, but everyone this far I’ve had great energy with. Maybe it’s because we’re halfway to Tehachapi and folks are getting into the zone and don’t have time for friendship or conversation, but the last few days I’ve felt more isolated and ostracized. In my daily life I struggle heavily with mental health and feeling the need to disappear. Like, those I’m around take a deep breath of relief when I leave the room. One of the reasons why I’ve felt the need to come out and do the PCT. I’ve always been an accepting person, but I feel like I can’t be accepted without the need for over explanation. Those who watch from afar, do so because they have no interest in getting close to me. I wish, sometimes, I didn’t have to try so hard for others to enjoy my presence. That I could just unequivocally be myself with no judgment. No trail update today, just getting my head down and moving forward, at this point that’s all I have in me to do.
After a long day in the hot sun, I decided to pull away from trail and go to the Cedar Glen Malt Shop. By far the best bacon cheeseburger I’ve had on trail yet! Just a short distance from the Deep Creek bridge, I met Terrance, a rad dude from Cedar Glen who, I must say, is the coolest dude I’ve met while on trail. He offered me a ride to the malt shop and showed me some new classic tunes! After feeling low, I tried my first Yerba Matte, which jazzed me up completely. Found out he also produced music and has his own fishing guide business “Deep Creek Outfitters”. We went a bit off-roading and it was quite the pace change from walking all day. Although this morning was tough, I was able to turn it around thanks to others. Feeling low because of others and in my own mental health, I was able to find solace in a really positive experience from Terrence and those at the Malt Shop. I will 1000% be coming back here for a more intensive Cedar Glen experience, it reminds me of home.
3 WEEKS???
Day 21, brings me to 3 weeks on trail. I’m growing increasingly frustrated with my slowness and inability to wake up early enough to get the day going. I passed the 300 mile marker today, but I’m feeling as if it’s not as exciting as 100 and 200. I was looking forward to celebrating with my trail family, but I had to break off for the group. Due to a disagreement with one of the members, I felt it was best to step back and move solo for a while. It’s a collective experience, so when people tend to make things about themselves and ruin it for others, it’s unfortunate. I’ve felt a bit of tension between this member and I for a 100 miles or so, things finally came to a head and I just needed to separate, so 300 mile celebration solo. My friends made it to Wrightwood already and I haven’t made to the Hot Springs yet. Feeling a tad defeated in my ability. I initially came into this like I would crush miles day 1 and meet all the people, but I’ve been more on my own this whole time. There’s a few people I wish I could link up with because they were cool and I didn’t appreciate their energy enough. I try to stay away from social media during my time on trail because I get a bit discouraged when I see those I’ve met do the things I thought I could do. Although I’m still making progress and I’m still on trail, I fear I’m nothing compared. Comparison is the thief of joy. That statement rings true today.
I made it to Deep Creek Hot Springs today. I saw my first outwardly naked man and I was sorely unprepared for it. Although this is a clothing optional, there were kids present and I felt it was a bit unnecessary. Decided to camp here tonight, my third cowboy camp. Might mess around and dip into the hot spring for a late night soak, although I’d have no way to dry off, I might end up naked. I’m going to try and push my biggest mile day yet and get to McDonald’s tomorrow. That’s 34 miles. Doable, but can be unlikely. I’m gonna wake up early early and push 15-20 miles before noon. At that rate , I’d be able to make it. I’m running out of fuel, and all my food items are cookables. I have no faith in my system and I feel like I’ve been very fortunate this whole trip as I had an extra canister, now just down the small one. I overdo my cooking, 2 hot beverages, 3 hot meals a day. I’m gonna make sure I have enough fuel by buying either 2 small canisters or 1 big one. I have a flip fuel, but I haven’t found that many hiker boxes this whole trip. Pushing miles it is, just to get some hot food in me and then on to Wrightwood by Uber to get around the closure. We’ll see how the day goes.
I enjoy cowboy camping. At first I was terrified of being eaten alive by animals. It reminds me of that meme “a bear favorite burrito is a human in a sleeping bag”. As I’ve done it several times now, it’s become one of my favorite things to do. Laying underneath the open sky and watching the planes go by is so peaceful to me. I’ve seen stars in an incredible way, I live in a very open non light polluted area, but out here it feels different. I feel free. I feel like what our ancestors must have felt like when they traveled this very trail. It’s spiritual.
